Sometimes when I’m walking around campus (which can come close to 2 miles total walking on some days), I’ll notice that someone will be taking the same route as me for quite some distance. Sometimes, If it’s a girl especially, they become increasingly aware of my presence (i am often a few steps behind these persons), and they will flatter themselves with the possibility of me stalking them (like i said, girls especially).
I know this because they start acting fidgety and squirrelly, and most of the time they will call a friend and start speaking in an extremely quiet tone that seems to indicate fear to me. Then they begin to start looking back, pretending to be checking for something else, and often they change their path abruptly.
Behavior like this has encouraged me to actually start following them, as of late. I take delight in their silly fear–every girl here thinks they are a rape target at all times for some reason, or that they are desirable enough for ME to stalk them. Today i followed one in circles for awhile, doing a large circuit in and around the buildings around the Quad, getting closer and closer (mind you, this was a really ugly, big, enormous really, whale of a chewbacca girl). As i got close enough for her to hear me, I got on my phone and immeditaely upon opening it said “Yes. Target in range. Elimination imminent” in a heavy russian accent and ran past her as fast as I could just to throw her into a frenzy.
I’m still laughing about it heavily, but I’m worried I won’t be able keep doing it without attracting some unwanted legal attention.
It’s their own fault, somehow.
UPDATE* - i may record the next adventure on my phone.
March 5th, 2008 at 10:28 PM
Date with THE NIGHT!
March 5th, 2008 at 10:30 PM
I’ll take you out BOY!
March 5th, 2008 at 10:31 PM
The glove compartment isn’t accurately named.
March 5th, 2008 at 10:33 PM
Dreadful sorry, Clementine.
March 5th, 2008 at 10:38 PM
and i’ve learned and you’d think i’d be something more now,
but it just goes to show it is not what you know
March 5th, 2008 at 10:38 PM
So I look in your direction
But you pay me no attention, do you?
March 5th, 2008 at 10:41 PM
I just wanna live, dont really care about the things that they say.
March 5th, 2008 at 10:42 PM
I am an American aquarium drinker.
March 5th, 2008 at 10:42 PM
but you really need to listen to me
because I’m telling you the truth
i mean this, i’m okay!
(trust me!)
March 5th, 2008 at 10:43 PM
‘Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses, driving fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
We’ll all stay skinny ’cause we just won’t eat
And we’ll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger’s
Gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny
With her bleach blonde hair
And well…
March 5th, 2008 at 10:45 PM
Well this calls for,
A toast so,
Pour the champagne.
March 5th, 2008 at 10:49 PM
I was afraid that you would have a cyst.
“You suck so sleepy
just fake this, now please me”
March 5th, 2008 at 10:50 PM
Unos, dos, tres… Catorce!
March 5th, 2008 at 10:50 PM
I was afraid that you would have a cyst.
“You suck so sleepy
just fake this, now please me
March 5th, 2008 at 10:50 PM
UP AGAINST THE WALL! UP AGAINST THE WALL!
March 5th, 2008 at 10:52 PM
Im not O-Fucking-KAY!!!
March 5th, 2008 at 10:53 PM
Oh cant you see me standing here,
Ive got my back against the record machine
I aint the worst that youve seen.
Oh cant you see what I mean ?
Might as well jump. jump !
Might as well jump.
Go ahead, jump. jump !
March 5th, 2008 at 10:53 PM
GO AHEAD AND JUMP!!!
March 5th, 2008 at 11:01 PM
THE HOUSE.
March 6th, 2008 at 1:37 AM
I am a Banana. I am lost by the way.
March 7th, 2008 at 12:28 AM
i got chills
they’r multiplying
and im loosing control
for this powr your supply’n
ITS ELECTRIFING
so you better shape up
cause i need a man
and my heart is set on you…
March 7th, 2008 at 8:29 AM
Yo I’m super I’ll make a bitch squirm
For my, Su-per Sperm (check it)
Check it I give it to ya raw butt naked